What do you think when you see a Snickers chocolate bar? Let me tell you what comes to my mind. Every. Single. Time.
It was the 1994, my mom was in Italy with my sister for sister’s heart surgery (they stayed there for about 5 months). It was a serious operation, at the time only handful of hospitals in the world were doing it.
These were scary times for our family. Did I mention we were still at war and there was no way of communicating with anyone outside the country? Add that to the mix and you see to say these were difficult times is understatement.
One morning my dad came home from his night shift at the place where he was a security personnel for the UN, he was securing their parking lot. A nice UN man gave him a Snickers bar which dad saved for me. This was amazing! We had no water nor electricity and sweets were… hm… how do you put it? Nonexistent for the last four years. Yea, that describes it.
As a twelve year old girl I was so amazed by this tiny gift. I soon started to think about when will I eat this candy bar. It took me maybe two minutes to decide. I got up from our blue couch in our living room, I opened mom’s china cabinet and I put the candy bar in mom’s expensive china to be saved for my sister when she returns home. It sat there for the next 5 months. I was so happy I had a wonderful gift for her when she came home!
How is this story for a throwback Tuesday?
Big Fat Serbian Wedding last weekend.
Let me share some Serbian music with you on this fine Tuesday.
My little Serbian family.
Las few nights I have been waking up with war related nightmares.
They are horrible. Really ugly. Scary, too.
I do not try to forget the war, never. I just try to live everyday life without thinking all the time about things that have happened to us.
This week it is almost as if my body is trying to tell me I have not thought about things for some time and it is time to reconnect with my past.
Time to reflect. Time to say my prayers and thanks to God.
I am really grateful for surviving.
Grateful for my family’s survival.
But I do have unanswered questions that will hunt me for as long as I live.
This photo I took few years back is of a cemetery headstone of my best childhood friend’s grave. No visit to my hometown goes without me stopping by her grave. It is hard to look at it. It is hard to try to make sense why her, why so early? But this is realty. She died with her mother from the grenade wounds. They were found hugging each other.
So next time you think about the war on the Balkans, please do not ignore the fact that this is what happened to us Serbs in Croatia. It is painful to constantly listening to the media and everyone speak of my people as of evil ones. It is not true. Do not be ignorant. Educate yourself.